EDIT2: I HAVE DUG OUT THIS POST FROM THE DEEP AND PLAN TO KEEP IT ON TOP OF THE PILE TILL NOMINATIONS COME THRU AND AWARDS GIVEN !!!
EDIT1: APOLOGIES....IT IS THE W.P. STYLE INVITATIONAL AND NOT "MENSA" AS MENTIONED EARLIER.
ALL MATERIAL APPEARING ON THIS POST IS COPYRIGHTED.
In the true tradition of the the Washington Post STYLE Contest, I throw open the Cat&Chaos Contest .Thanks Aman, for the gentle goad! :-).
Stirred but not shaken (?), anyways here goes......
Aberrent: the prevailing rentals which deviate from what is normal or desirable.
Paradice :a place, situation, or condition in which a gambler finds perfect happiness.
Penny Envy: in psychoanalysis, the theory that some girls' and women's psychological problems stem from a sense of deprivation about not having (earned ) penny(s) .Very few psychologists now accept this concept.
Mento(s)pause: A time in a woman's life when stimulation diminishes and ceases, usually between the ages of 32 and 42 and she then has to pop 2 Mentos in her mouth.
Oki time for my Mentos break.......
EDIT1: APOLOGIES....IT IS THE W.P. STYLE INVITATIONAL AND NOT "MENSA" AS MENTIONED EARLIER.
ALL MATERIAL APPEARING ON THIS POST IS COPYRIGHTED.
In the true tradition of the the Washington Post STYLE Contest, I throw open the Cat&Chaos Contest .Thanks Aman, for the gentle goad! :-).
Stirred but not shaken (?), anyways here goes......
Aberrent: the prevailing rentals which deviate from what is normal or desirable.
Paradice :a place, situation, or condition in which a gambler finds perfect happiness.
Penny Envy: in psychoanalysis, the theory that some girls' and women's psychological problems stem from a sense of deprivation about not having (earned ) penny(s) .Very few psychologists now accept this concept.
Mento(s)pause: A time in a woman's life when stimulation diminishes and ceases, usually between the ages of 32 and 42 and she then has to pop 2 Mentos in her mouth.
Oki time for my Mentos break.......
109 comments:
Good one again.
Rx:
Menadrill ( Benadryl) – for John Abs-raham abs sans the workouts
Crowsin ( Crocin) - food for the soul
(http://www.zeenews.com/Zee-Exclusive/2006-10-17/329785news.html)
Tetracycling- Little kids on bicycles with four wheels
Calmpose - A yogaasan
Dyegene ( Digene) – Foetal color processing
Eyedex ( Iodex) - For easier ogling
Aspirin – For ‘new’ superstar aspirants like Bobby Deol and Sanjay Kapoor
Brewfeni ( Brufen) – Goan version of Irish Coffee
Tile'n'all( Tylenol) - perfect flooring solutions
............
Ultrasound - Kitty party underway
Easyji - Neta from Phagwara
...to probably be cont'd.
I am sure gonna try Brewfeni next visit to Goa!
And Crowsin, poor birds, nothing to crow about !
More later :-)
Mentos - Oh you meant toes?
Mentos - Dancing classes for women who step on men's toes on the dance floor.
Mentos - Men's toes. Wth!
Sentos - Perfumed feet
Bentos - old women's toes
Tentos - Begum Bedouini's dress shop
Rentos - Toes on rent for men who dance with women who never went to mentos
Pentos - People who can write with their toes
Dentos - ew..don't want to go there
wentos - chinese take away
Gento - Gent - in Japanese
Can u think of more?
FANTASTIC STUFF from both ladies!!! (Specially from AI. Sorry CAT... she's good at some things, you're better at others) :-)
I wish I was good at this.
Have you invited others to contribute?
Animesh? Annie?
Is this any good?
Apparent: The rent quoted before the actual rent is disclosed.
oki I will go bottoms up.....
Aman:nice go
I too tell A.I.that she is good...I am the WISE one and she is the WISECRACK one.Am sure A.I. will agree! ;-)
Will invite Animesh and Annie and everybody else...its a free for all, spread the word
.I.:was meant to be MENTOS ...the minty stuff. I am kinda got hooked onto it,so....
And am not interested as much in MenTOES!!
My inspiration comes late night but in the interest of keeping us on our toes, here goes for now......
Centos- the new spanish currency
Gentos used Pentos for Wentos and one needs Sentos when one Mentos :-)
More later I promise
Err,,,thanks...I think.
Dunno what u are thanking me for, but I am sure you sincerely menat it :D
Always ;)
btw, that was for Aman.
You're welcome.
Isn't the objective to find new meanings for existing words? Or are we allowed to dream up new words?
Put this up on Facebook or a link on Facebook, inviting friends.
The original objective was to twist existing words to give it a brand new meaning, but hey if creativity demands forging new ones...all game.
bonne apetit : french male chimps appreciating a female female chimps decolletage ;-)
cowardice : frozen water too scared to melt
washbored : a dhobi with ennui
kum-pewter : a little less of the antimony please [ref]
/that's it for now :)
I move that the pronunciation remain the same. We are aiming for puns here. No?
If we go to the link to the Washington Mensa Contest, we notice that a letter is either added or removed or replaced with another to get a brand new word which can be twisted to have a funny new meaning.
Puns are always fun too.
Lets ask CAT?
D'mento's : The old age home in Bandra
Momento - BRB...
Memento - Who am I? Wait, what is this?
Sentimento - For mood swings
Sacramento - Holy mint
ALL, I say go ahead and spout....we can categorize into sections later!! Creative juices ahoy.
Great goin A & A!!!!
Emusculate (emasculate) : Unmanly sorts working out to build muscle mass
Iceburg (iceberg) :Cold burger
Contemporary: Part time crook
nemissus (nemesis): wifey taking revenge
French Hiss: Open Mouth hiss where tongues nag
More from where that came later!
Err-apparent - stage fright
Hair-apparent - time for the wax strip
Ire-apparent - shoe@bush
Ere-apparent- before it begins to show
Apparent- Appa pays till Venkataraju Chennamangalam Patanimannan Ramachandran moves out.
Apparant - What VCPR has to hear till he moves out
Upparent- Rents gone up
Thumbs Up to Contemporary!
Nemesis reminds me of the Bitter Half!
Two more people who'd love doing this: phoenixritu & IHM.
Ajit used to be good at all these, right? Remember Peter & Repeater, Robert Redfort?
Identity: Bruised ego?
Google: Exhortation to Ogle?
Pissimist: What the car behind you gets on it's windscreen if you pee out of the window!
Am I getting better at this or what??? :-)
Subscribe: Assistant Journalist?
Collapse: A fault on the part of the Colonel? (Help improve?)
Accurate: A clergyman who's right!
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art17133.asp
:))))))))))))))
HOWLARIOUS AI!!! :-D))))))))
Diagnostic: Condemned to die before experiencing a miracle of God
Magneta: Inexplicable attraction to colors that are visible only to the fairer sex
Prototype: First true-type font invented
Antithesis: Contrasting results from a doctoral research
Snoose: Euphemisn for verdict to be hanged until dead
Confuse:Cheap Chinese glue
I'm passe- well..
Colesterrall - planII incase we're all wrong
Impausible- me,esp. when given an invitation to play with words
Perpedual - continuous confusion
Testimoney: money checker
Damnage:Cussing when see your first grey hair
Repulse:Coming back from a near death experience
Drivelle:Silly female driver
Minusocular: Myopia
Yoghurt: Injury while doing yoga
Serenade: A drink to go along while singing a love song
Diass: A raised platform one stands up on to make an ass of oneself
Dandilion:A top notch lion
Dramatics: Stage fright
Sushe: A raw female
Penury: Poor quality jury
Mortguage:An instrument to determine if dead
Inputt:Indoor Golf
Overdoze: Kumbakarna's nickname
Landlard:The fat guy who charges too much rent.
Largass: A very generous sized backside.
Surromate:Substitute partner
Ruminate: A room shared by 8 people
At Lagerheads: Pub brawls
COLLAPSE: In tandem (?)
ALL,WHAT A FUNFEST,KEEP THEM COMING!!!
Aman, who is Ajit
Capten - Iski topi uske sar
Petrifry- blow cold blow hot
Orbituary - Kalpana Chawla
Recouperate - Musharraf?
Pathotic - Micheal Jackson
Par-don - Mafia goes lateral
Coup-le...see? C-O-U-P? yeah!
Faminist - Down with food!
Pestyside- Work on it
Fantasize - 0
Pashta - Italian breakfast in India
Ole!! - hailstorm in a bullfight
If I may..
The loin of Bollywood - "Lily, don't be silly" fame.
No comments on my submissions? They must've been pretty rotten! (Or you guys very self obsessed!)
Will start by pointing out those I really liked:
Zaza... Each one is Excellent!!! Superb stuff! (No relative of Gabor are you?)
Anita... Confuse & Perpedual: Eminently Laudable! May I suggest another few for perpedual: continuously on two legs OR continuous dilemma? :-/
CAT... :-) to testimony, Drama-tics, Overdoze, Surromate, Lagerheads, Ruminate & Yoghurt!
May I...?
Dandelion: Lion overtly conscious about personal appearance!
Anita... Brilliant (though "daring") to Orbituary & FAMINIST!!!
Pashta could also be Turkish breakfast in India?
And here are a few of my "ifforts":
Flatulence: Epidemic that strikes today's female models for their sins.
Manchester: Same as above.
Debate: Let off the hook?
Management: The highly effective modern science of making a man age faster, practised by large corporations, also taught in expensive schools.
Curry: Dog in a hurry? OR Spicy, Gravy based dog-meat preparation?
:-(
I'm really struggling...!
My personal favourites: ( out of them ALL -first to last submissions this far)
First me :P
Dyegene
Brewfeni
Easyji
Tentos
D'mento's
Ole ( for the hindi/english meanings)
Now you
Contemporary ( CAT)
Identity ( Aman)
Subscribe ( Aman)
Diagnostic ( BRILLIANT - ZAZA)
All of Zaza's rest
Repulse ( CAT)
Overdoze ( HMMMM CAT)
Lagerheads ( CAT)
This IS fun!!
No takers for pissimist, flatulence or management I see... :-(
Oki first, list of the ones I like most by order of appearance (does not include mine:-)) :
Dyegene -A.I.
Bonne Apetit- Animesh
Cowardice-Animesh
Apparent- A.I.
Identity-Aman
Accurate-Aman
Diagnostic- Zaza
Prototype-Zaza
Perpedual :A.I.
Faminist: A.I.
Manchester:Aman
Prediction: Baby talk
Heir apparent :Wig
Typist: A draw in a drunkard contest
Turnstile: Head turning fashion
License : A white lie
Thats all for now
malice : the gangsta-mother of blood-sucking hair-dwellers. [oblig. video link.]
aquaguard : Ganesha's name if Parvati had made him only of water
antelope : what cheenti in love do
Lisense-pseudo intellect
Posthomus - Flatulance
Perflexed - Working out the wrong muscles
Pennytense - Recession
Greenhows - Bhala uskee pun mere pun se funny kaise?
Pessifist - Stingy bawa
Delighted - weight gain
Conversion - Faketake
Aw c'mon Cat, tell which ones of yours made you smile too.
CAT!!!
You've improved by leaps & bounds! That latest set is the best yet!!!
I was laughing out loud in office, attracting stares at "Typist"!!! Absolutely FANTASTIC! Way up there with Faminist!!! Maybe a shade better, because it hits a second later! Takes you by surprise!!! BRILLIANT!!!
May I suggest License: The smell of lies?
Animesh=Lord of Japanese Animation?
Aquaguard is creative, but Antelope is FUNNY!!! :-D
Preceding: Early signs of balding?
Manicure: A doctor
Constipation: Hypochondriac
Absent: Pot bellied
I am enjoying this too much.
A.I.: No faves among ones brood, no?
Antelope...:D
Aquagarud: Inspired!!!
Thank yee Aman for your kind words :-)
@all: good stuff. keep it coming.
@CAT: I didn't mention the flying vehicle of Vishnu. Now I do:
aqua garud : if Vishnu rode a penguin.
and this comes from one of my fav. jokes
Nag Panchami : What happened when I fought the Cobra in a ring.
Cat-has-trophy - CAT got her tongue :))))
( Great going Cat..'typist' is truly inspired )
Marathong - err..T in a G?
Stoopiditty - a lowly tune
Revulution - Anti gravity
@AI: Thanks.
/offtopic: original joke
Q1. What is the opposite of Nag Panchami
??
A. Nag did not punch me.
!!!
Q2: What is the inverse of Nag Panchami
??
A. I punch the Nag
!!!!
[joke teller runs for cover]
haha..Nag panchami was good!!!!
( thot I sorta ruined it by spelling it out...so deleted comment)
Keep it going folks!
Piazza: Tasy Italian food that is gobbled up on the porch when delivered.
Pornpoise: Obscene video of snout nosed aquatic mammal (though, shot in style)
Recollect: What bankers do to piss off trusting customers who set up autodebit instructions on their accounts.
Current: Rent paid for a small apartment to live a dog's life.
Flubberghast: Reaction evinced from absentminded professor's serendipity.
Friar: Priest who bores people with 'pakaoo' sermons.
Adam's Apple: Swanky laptop which Eve hated.
Bushmen: Nomadic African tribe demanding to either rename their tribe's name, or the previous President's (They're touchy people).
Dol(e)lar: Alms paid out to ill-managed companies of the free World.
hahhahahahhahaha @ bushmen lollllllll
Zaza, you are THE Czar Czar
Adams Apple.....Applause
@Zaza/Bushmen: _bows down_ *respect* !!
Annnnnnnnnnnnddddd a half century...all rise!
Zaza,you are invited to visit and join as member :-)
ALL, please visit:
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=54781069279
Cinnamon: synonym for sin in mann (tsk tsk)
Chorus: Band of thieves
Forbade: Adults only
Curfew: Not if Maneka Gandhi had her way
Hyperbole: talkative
Czar Czar is truly apt!!!
CAT... GREAT thinking on the Facebook group!
Animesh... Didn't like the lord of Jap animation? What do you think of Animesh=
"A little like hostility"? OR
"Random net"?
Any good? :-(
Cinnamon: I don't & I won't! ;-)
And another priceless one from Czar Czar over SMS:
Pitt-y = Sympathy for women who don't recognize good looks!
And inspired by that...
Pithy = modicum of sympathy?
Hastinapura - Mona Lisa
Sense Friction - Mythology
Surrendipity - OK u win! now stop crying!
Crapediem - Death by Bisolax
Sens or - nonsense
Postulate - Indian postal service
Rumination - Turkey
AI,
Didn't get Hastinapur, Sense Friction & Sensor at all. :-(
Thumbs Up to the rest.
Doesn't matter. As long as you got the rest. :))
I didn't get the rest. I need to go to Goa again!
article: cartoon
barbar(h)ic: drunk barbar
boisterous: teenager gal's stressos
arthritis: dictionary
ventilate :not punctual
profit : a gym
rectangle: straighten
Dilate: bicentennial man
Gazelle: Woman, wonder-eyed
Snigger: Snide racist remark
iCicle: Smart two wheeler produced by Apple, with 2 MP camera and GPRS
rectangle: lopsided end of digestive tract
angle: dyslexic angel?
Uranus: ***Self-explanatory*** :-D
Farce: Funny looking behind.
While we're waiting for more from the Czar, here are some from the proletarian:
Farce: Also Fake Bum!
Explode: Venturing into unknown territory made him go bust! (Also, Blow it while/by venturing into unknown territory!)
Neptune: Space Age Music!
Debugger: reverse sodomisation.
sodomize: DO they?
Parton: "I'm Sorry I was staring..."
Pamela: The kind of fair Indian men want to visit!
Oh man, this is turning into a 'discover the hidden word devil in you' affair!! :)))
Brillianto!!
Ginnastics - Drunken brawls
Copperknickers - Chastity belt
Cycologists - round and round and round
Illumiknotty - Psychedelic lights
Artechoke - abs-tract art
Kickass ALL,keep them coming!
Mousy: a timid aunt
Sanctimony: Stock market
Civilize: Hypocrisy
Catabolism: Meow
Weasel out: We sell out
Godzilla: Heaven
Tenderloin: Ajit in a romantic mood
Adulterate: ForBADE
Volleyball: ejaculate
Silicone: Madonna’s costume
Tongue in Cheek: French kiss
Brazil: Enthusiastic Support
Asbestos: Your personal choice totally
Holster: trigger happy
Buffering: Suffering a Full Monty
Perculate - head count
Aburration - Tummy tuck
Ballistick - Cricket (tsktsk, aaj kal ke bachhay!)
Weakend - Er.. dysfunction
Amazonyen - Confusing Japanese currency
Leera - Italian men!
Flamenco - Italian fire fighting company
Flamengo - Bipasa Basu
Flamango - Spicy aam ka achaar
Ballet - ___ on hire for cowards
Hairarches - Balding patterns
Interfearing - Recurring doubts
Recur - put someone back in his place
Whoa..this cat sure got out of the bag :)) Great going. BTW..CATering ka kya hua? hehe
CATering is under CATscan, CATalyse not. These CATch phrases were CATatonic,CATchy and NOT CATerwauls,no????
CATapult,so did you,I guess it will CATchall ;-)
Catalogue of Categories of Cats.
Catsnap - Let sleeping cats lie
Catapulse - Changes wrt temper
Catatonic - Gin..no vodka..Absolut-ely
Categori - Yep
Catablog - Cat&chaos
Cathersis - Haven't met her yet
ACatchment - Home, hearth and NF
Caterpillar - Moospot wall
Catalyst - MoM ( hehe...that will certainly lead to a catsnap)
Catchyoo - Bless you
Now this is getting wierd... so :X
That was a CATastrophy, weird but....
Feel like CAT's whisker!!
Dogmatic: Name for Japanese pet toy
Doggone: Police slang for lost pet FIR
Dogma: Mother of Dog!
Giddyap - teenaged girls chatter
Whoa - This is a g rated blog!
Sherrif - Decent lion
Spur - A cat with a lisp
Cowboy - From Texan mythology
Kenny Rogers - erm
Lasso - Mangalsutra
Concha - Nepali
Saddler -A very depressed snake
Tantrik: Extra Strong Sunblock?
Neetu: 2 Knees?
Nitin: 3 Knees?
Anila: Song in one's heart on espying a pretty knee.
Mujib: Cat's tongue?
Aman : single-mind.
Holi : Bruce's street-walking sister.
Aman would be non-mind. (Didn't know we were using Hindi as well...)
:-) to Holi.
Filmfare: (Indian) Representing all that is wrong with Cinema.
roulette: risky tenant
abscissa: crunches
circumscribes: some who pretend to be "journalists"
disorient:westernize
Circumsribes - Editors
Describe - Lay off journo
Ascribe - Buttattoo - Ghajini style
Transcribe - Queen Journo
Grawitty - Seriously funny
Proclamation - The right to remain silent
Disorient--good one!!
loll @ neetu & nitin.
Cat, how about u get 5 words of 8 letters each..and make us slog at finding different ways to contort them, then u pick the best..and he/she comes up with the next 5 words?
Good idea....more takers???
Here goes:
BLIZZARD
EFFERVESCE
ISOSCELES
NONSENCE
SURROUND
Your Best Shot all :)
Since when did
"EFFERVESCE" have 8 letters?
One letter bubbled over...! ;-)
LOL to Disorient, Describe, Transcribe!
Grawitty: Seriously funny writing on the wall...?
Blizzard - Visually impaired reptile
Blitzard - an abusive offensive
Effervesce - Where did u learn to cuss like that?
Isosceles - Monica? When?
Nonsence - Lacking soul
Sur-round - French for ON the circle?
LOL to "one letter bubbled over",Grawitty!!
Nice ones ALL :-).
You could continue with effervesce (preferable)or EFFEROUS.
The essence was to play around with a given set of words, number of letters was not critical.
Animesh, your Vidhushak group not game to this game????
Cremate: Fondness for milk products did him in!
Ellipse: Girl with speech disorder is shy.
Black Pepper: Dravidian Cheerleader
Spoke: Cruel words
Margarita: Drunken Thatcher
Fairbanks: What's that?
Joclosed?
My attempt to resuscitate before jocloses finally!!
Nefertiti: vowed never to go topless
asteroid: heavenly haemorrhoids
buxom: It bucks some
cereal: opposite of surreal
isosceles: you saucy more
asphyxiate: plastic surgery
LOL...Holi and its side effects!
Good ones Cat!
sexting: Teens sending their sexy pictures via MMS (oh wait, this is a real word)
Flicksated - Satisfied with MMS-es
Bandarful!!!
efface: nose job,face lift..the works
go haywire: what some types of grass do to you
more later (I hope)
ALL, do we start to select nominees for the various categories or is it early days yet :-)
You're just greedy for comments!
Let's do it NOW!!!
If that is the unanimous opinion, plzzz select the nominees:
Annndd the categories are....
1)The Best New word coinage
2)The Best RErepresentation of existing words
3)The Best Twist (change of a letter or 2) of existing words
4)The Smartest of them ALL
5)The Funniest of them ALL
6)The most Original of them ALL
A minimum of 3 nominees are essential
7) Most DELICIOUSLY racist of them all...???
Indigenious - Bharatiya akalmand...mhanje..amhee sagle.
Akalmand - dimwit
ShyKnees- bow legs
ChapKnees - knock kneed
Amircan - Shahrukh can't?
Arsetrailian - Pull your own weight!!
Fwench - Paan chewing kaantabaee
Rushian - Rushdie follower
Lebunice - Nice behind
Madrassi - South Indian rope trick
Gujrathi - Modi/Advani collab
Category 7 included :-)
@indigenious, gujrathi :))))))))
And yes to answer your question,A.I., Shah Rukh CAN'T! :-P
Pakora: heat fried Goras
Fundamentalistans: Some of India's neighbours
Chaina: a superpower in the making
Engulf: Malluhaven
Dehelli: need I say more
Slumbay/Marathension: one claim to fame this bon(ne)bay :-)
Indipop - Gandhiji
Inditerminate - Pak's dream
Indignance - India's roads
Indefinite- Not with our population growth
Indiscriminate - sms nocriminals-space-your name to 58888
Indiwedual - Turn-khadi-coats
THIS IS SHASHWAT GUPTA'S CONTRIBUTION WHICH HE PUT IN A ANOTHER POST.
Pickpocket–> Economic Offender
Indifference–> Spirit of [insert Indian city name]
Car–> earth-unfriendly, vertically-challenged mode of transport
Car Wash Worker–> vehicle-appearance specialist
Dog–> quadruped non-human associate
Failure–> non-traditional success
Homeless person–> residentialy flexible individual
Pervert–> person engaged in nontraditional espionage
Prostitute–> body entrepreneur
Not fair...was hoping someone else would push this to a century.
Century - Penury + 1 cent
AI,
It's only fair that you did.
so is this gonna go another half century before we have nominations???
don't be shy, ALL...come on!
And here goes one for the road....
coarse: 2 unrefined dudes sitting side by side.
Coarse: 1. What you chart on Indian roads.
2. What you are put through in PMC schools?
Politics: Infested with many, many fleas.
AssAssiNation - Our neighbors
Also, Prostitute–> नगरवधू (wife of the whole town)
What is the male equivalent for that?
Shashwat, gender is irrelevant when term prostitute is used,so no bias please.....
A.I.: I would hazard a "Kaamgar", wot say
http://www.nipissingu.ca/faculty/williams/figofspe.htm
Discoarse - Mithun Chakraborty
( Iyaamadiscodancer tatatara!)
Discount - CA with happy feet
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